You are the ONLY you

Take time for you – Love who you are

February, the month dedicated to loving another person. All around you are red hearts and romantic greeting cards professing your love to another, but how much time do you spend loving yourself? We are our own worst critics, so much so that we keep ourselves from being happy and truly enjoying all that we have to be grateful for. We look in the mirror and find fault – rather than focus on our beauty. At the end of the day we focus on our failures rather than the wins (no matter how small they may be).

be youLife is so busy, some days I feel like it is a struggle to take a moment to enjoy time with my family. My needs are usually the last thing on the ‘to do’ list (if they even make it on). For some being busy is a badge of honour. You cannot let the external world dictate your self worth. Be busy if it makes you happy, but don’t give in to societal pressures.

I am always so impressed by stay at home Mom’s who are so dedicated to their children and their home and make it look so easy – because I know I could not do it. I also know that it is near impossible for most of them to find a second for themselves, especially when the wee ones are home all day. Sometimes guilt gets in the way of doing things for yourself. I know that when I had my second daughter I found int very difficult to leave her side, my poor husband lost me for about 4 years. She would cry when I left her to the point that I could not enjoy myself. It was actually my husband that encouraged me to get out for a weekend with my girl friends. There was crying (both of us) when I left, but after a glass or 3 of wine, I relaxed and by the end of the weekend I felt like a new me, with energy. I returned home to a clean house, everyone was still alive and happy to see me. Try to fight the guilt and allow yourself to have time alone, away from the family so you can recharge and be a better you!

Working is not an option, there are too many life necessities that require an income. I keep forgetting to buy a lottery ticket, so becoming independently wealthy isn’t an option. So how do we find time for ourselves? First of all, we need to accept our situation and let go of the things we cannot control. You cannot do it all. Appreciate the moment you are in. I am all to often distracted by what I need to next rather than being present. This is a hard one, to turn off your brain and allow yourself to enjoy the moment. If you find your mind racing – make a physical list – write out your thoughts or to do list, then tuck it away until you are able to work on it.

Doing for others is a great high. I know I love the warm fuzzy of making someone else’s day better. This does not mean a big gesture, it can be asa simple as smiling, letting someone ahead of you in line, cleaning out your closet and make a donation. I pan to make this one a priority. So often I am focused on my own issues that I forget how my mood can effect those around me.

Each week do something that makes you feel good! Exercising is a great way to do something for yourself that will make you feel good, but you already know that. The key is to make time for you. Don’t put pressure on yourself, it does not have to be a big event. Just take time to pause and think of yourself. You can meditate, go for a walk, enjoy a chia latte and cinnamon biscotti, whatever you do – do it alone and focus on your positives. A good friend of mine has a great exercise – anytime we say something negative about ourselves we have to say 10 positive things. The list is hard to start, but you feel great once you are done!